What says “Happy Valentines Day” better than naming vermin? Thanks to several zoos, museums, and zoological societies you can name a roach after your special someone, or someone who has been bugging you.

The Bronx Zoo offers several roach naming packages complete with tumblers and tote bags. “The Original” package for $15 names a Madagascar hissing cockroach and sends a digital certificate. The Bronx Zoo is aimed more toward naming a cockroach for someone you love rather than getting revenge on an old flame. They say, “Name a Roach for your Valentine because roaches are forever.”

The Houston Museum of Natural Science has a $10 package that includes a digital certificate and a heart-shaped pin complete with a cartoon roach. The named roaches live in The Heartbreak Motel located in the museum store. They encourage you to name a roach for your special someone or an ex “because nothing makes a heart beat faster than a roach.”

The San Antonio Zoo has a “Cry Me A Cockroach” fundraiser. They offer three different packages at $5, $10, and $25. The $10 package is a roach, the $25 dollar package is a rodent, and the $5 package is a veggie. All of these will then be fed to various animals at the zoo. As a part of each package, they give the option to send a digital valentines card letting them know they have been named after a roach, veggie, or mouse and fed to an animal. For $150, they will send a personalized video for your not-so-special someone in your life.

The El Paso Zoo’s “Quit Bugging Me” program is geared toward those in your life that are, well, bugging you. While donations are encouraged they are not necessary. Any donations made will benefit the El Paso Del Norte American Association of Zookeepers Chapter.

The Brookfield Zoo will name a cockroach after your ex for a minimum donation of $15. They will then send you a certificate of naming and the name will be placed on the Cockroach Naming Board.

Seal it with a hiss this Valentines Day, and give your loved ones a gift to remember.